"(So far, it has hurt my heart.) But I'm gonna say no-- because i have hope for the future of my February, and I refuse to give that up."
Before I go to bed, I need to say good things about life. No one is awake-- so I will say them to the anonymous readers of my blog. Hello.
* I am thankful for the unity of the women I live with. A few weeks ago, one of us started crying. "I've talked about this to multiple people," she said. "...and I haven't cried at all. I don't know why I'm crying right now."
"Because you can," Melissa said.
This weekend I did the same with them, and I know that it is because here, I can. We are constantly reaching for each other. Tonight, we got a new fish. Then, we came home and ate a pineapple together.
* I am grateful for my job. I'm not sure why it is perfect for this period in my life, but I often get the feeling that it is.
* I am relieved for the knowledge I am gaining this semester. It fills me up, inspires me, frees me. Regardless, I cannot sink this far into studying anymore. I NEED PEOPLE in my life. I always thought that, but I never proved it to myself until the past few weeks. It is so good for me, to now understand this in a concrete way.
* I am convinced that age is mostly irrelevant.
* I am also convinced that everyone would benefit from writing letters to someone. Why don't we write letters anymore?
* I love the mountains. They never fail me. I am home in this town. I'm not sure how that happened, but it did. I think it is possible to have more than one home.